MY 11 YEAR OLD COUSIN SENT ME A FRIEND REQUEST ON...
I feel as if lately, my memory has been a bit patchy. Sometimes at the end of the day, I sit there and ask myself “what did I do today?” or “was that today?” I don’t know if it’s my memory, my focus of attention or what. And sometimes I feel like I’m aware of my daily plans, but I feel unprepared because I can’t really grasp what day it is....
Marry your best friend. I do not say that lightly. Really, truly find the...– N’tima (via jececilia)
Capricorn: wow you pissed me off so I'm going to sulk in silence and snap if spoken to
Aquarius: YOU MADE ME UPSET IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD /melts into a dramatic heap
Pisces: I'M GONNA FUCKING THROW THINGS. LIKE THE BIGGEST TANTRUM. YOU HAVE -EVER- SEEN.
Aries: WOW I'M SO MAD for like a second. What's for dinner?
Taurus: BRB SMASHING HEADLONG THROUGH A WALL TO KILL YOU
Gemini: Oh, I'm not mad. Wait. YES I FUCKING AM. Okay maybe not. BUT THEN AGAIN--
Cancer: ...oh. I'm angry. But you'll never know. Tillit'stoolate. Cookie?
Leo: /INDISCERNIBLE NOISES OF RAGE
Virgo: how could you do this to me. how. HOW??? Get out of my life. No wait baby come back...
Libra: Passively plotting your demise.
Scorpio: This'll only sting for a second. Unlike my wounds which'll bleed FOREVER and you'll never hear the end of it. WHIIIINE
Sagittarius: I have to leave before I kill someone. Bye!
I don’t say it as much as I should, but I’m thankful for everything you do for your individual self, for us, and for thinking ahead for a future with me. I know I do my own thing, and you do yours, and we hardly get enough time together whenever we see each other (squeezing in work, our social lives, and our families), but you still continue to stand right by my side and hold my hand...
The Seven Shittiest Sins
Greed: I want shit
Envy: I want your shit
Wrath: I'm going to wreck your shit
Lust: I'm into some freaky shit
Gluttony: This is some tasty shit
Sloth: I don't feel like doing shit
Pride: I am the shit
bre-aking: My mom’s mother’s day gift this year is the fact that I haven’t made her a grandmother yet. You’re welcome.
psychoticpingouins: 48 years ago a girl said “oh fuck me” to her best friend while walking in the street, a guy who randomly passed by answered by “let me at least buy you dinner first”. I present to you my grandparents, in love since then and celebrating their 47 years of marriage today.
Your 20’s are your ‘selfish’ years. It’s a decade to immerse yourself in every...– Kyoko Escamilla (via beatsandbrushes)
"Do I have to dress cute?"
Dave: Do I have to dress cute?
Me: Idk, do I look cute?
Me: Well then there's your answer
Mom: She always looks cute. She can be in shorts and a tank top and she'll still look cute
Dave: ok, ok. -starts choking me-
Me: Ahhhh! You're ugly!
Dave: Yeah? Well then, we're gonna have some ugly babies
Dad: Don't give me no ugly grandchildren
Mom: Naw uh, we're gonna have some cute grand babies
Johnny: Grandma's gonna pinch you
Dave: Don't say that